PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
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What is personality?
Personality is a set of personal traits, consists of tangible and intangible characteristics like attitude, behavior, character, discipline etc.
These traits and unique to each individual, and are intrinsic in nature. Unless someone is disturbed mentally or physically and become lunatic, these traits are remain embedded in his/her consciousness. Having said, it implies that, any individual who maintains the above qualities consistently in good spirit, is often called by the society as an impeccable personality. Personality is always judged in accordance with one’s own feelings, thoughts and behavior while dealing with people and environment, sometimes through social interactions. Personality is genetically based internal characteristic and acts almost similar ways in variable situations.
Discover the diamond in you – Burning desire excavate the hidden diamond in you
Diamonds are very rare and precious. Everyone wants diamonds, but how to get it. Earn it or make it. With burning desire we can discover those diamonds in us, and once discovered, we cut them beautifully and make them more dazzling.
Desire embeds willpower
There is one thing the automatically emerges when we have a strong desire, which is willpower. If my desire is to become an entrepreneur, my focus should always be in that, irrespective of its results, often achievable though. Then I need to have willpower to continue the jorney, in achieving my goal, apart from required skills. Hence, my mind is automated in tandem with my focus. In order to achieve the desired goal, I need to have the enthusiasm and put the efforts accordingly, with impeccable personality.
Personality – Unusual perceptions
Many people tend to make mistakes while recognizing the personality with the physical appearance. If you refer personality as height, glamour, complexion and stature to determine personality, it is time to review your thinking process. Physical appearance does matter in regards to glamour and elegance, and never contained in personality. Good personality is simply consists of the following four aspects:-
Character Behavior Attitude Discipline
Out of the above mentioned four aspects, character and behavior together plays an important role in determining an individual’s personality. Attitude and discipline are still considered as good personality traits, but character and behavior plays an important major role in deciding a good personality.
What is Character?
The invariable and socially acceptable composition of mental, ethical, attitudinal and behavioral traits executed in a disciplined manner by a person, is often called as character.
“Reputation is the shadow, Character is the tree.” – Abraham Lincoln
People with good character always practice good values, They practice values because they believe in them. They do right things for right reasons. They would not do things, even if they knew that they would not get caught, but still they don’t do it. You are not you, with your name and money, the real you is your perceivable character.
How can we improve our character?
If someone is improving their personality means he or she is improving their character. Character is what we know, who we are. We must work to improve our own character, teach good character to our children, and help those around us to improve their character. Character education plays important role in improving one’s character. In order to improve character, the following points will be kept in mind all the time:-
- Try to resist the various temptations that confront you
- Show empathy on people
- Always seek the truth
- Be honest! A single dishonest thing will kill your character
- Guard against irrational impulses
- Be complacent with what you have
- Fulfill rightful duties
- Never procrastinate the things
- Never impose your wish on others
- Seek peace and pursue it earnestly
- Govern yourself all the time
- Should have noble and worthy motives
- Be cool and calm while taking important decisions, yet prudently
- Have patience and conquer all fears
- Do your best in whatever you do
- Work hard and shun laziness
- Do exercise fro physical and mental fitness
Parents hope that their children should grow up with good character. Employers went honest and productive workers. Teachers want to educate respectful and motivated students. We all want to live in a society consisting of people with good character. Simply hoping and wanting is not sufficient, everybody should have good character, so that the society will be full of good character people.
What is Behavior?
An action or activity of an individual that denotes its deportment, showing disposition, without his or her conscience, is called behavior.
Behavior – Perception
Human beings are social animals. Since we are living in a society, we need to intereact with others on various occasions to meet our personal or work demands. In order to get our work done, we need to act. When we do any action, behavior is cloaked in it. Whether we observe ourselves or not, while doing an action, others always observe how we act and what is our disposition, during the process of activity. The other people’s conception and perception on us, is our behavior. This behavior is varied on different occasions with different people based on our temperament at that particular time.
Why do human beings involve in a particular activity?
Human beings typically have innate urge to act in a reasonable and compulsion situations. Whatever the situation is, human beings behave in a specific way, which is enigmatic process to examine. Still not insurmountable though!
Why do human beings change activities?
Every human being has certain needs, for which they need to act. When their actions are not up to the level to satisfy their needs, they act inherently with differnet proportion.
Behavior (Management – Observation – Realization – Monitor)
If you are a manager and your responsibility is to manage things to accomplish your desired results, you need to understand your own behavior first. When you are confident that you have the ability to judge the behavior of the people, then it will become easy for you to control the activities of the poeple and mould them, according to your requirement. If you observe how a person acts, you can tell how a person feels and it will enable you to help people adjust to any type of situation. When you realize your own potential, you will often behave withing the limits, which is a good behavior.
Observing human behavior is a complex process, with time and practice, it is surmountable. When you are able to observe human behavior with correctness, you gain the knowledge on, why people act in certain ways. When you know the various behaviors of people, it becomes very easy for you to monitor and guide them to work in a result oriented manner.
Following points are good behvioral practices for good personality:-
- Judge your daily activities
- Monitor your behavior regularly
- Set good examples for others whatever you do
- Angriness is a bad behavior, avoid it
- Actively ignore some misbehaviors
- Encourage and praise good behaviors of others
- Doing every work in time is a good behavior
- Respect other people’s time
- Well organized action is a good behavior
- Sarcasm and criticism are bad behaviors
- Your behavior model should be acceptable by the society
- Be good and teach good
- Do your own work by yourself
- Avoid abusive language
What is Attitude?
Attitude is the view of a person, whether positive or negative, while responding towards personnel, objects, or situations.
Nobody has ever maintained same attitude throughout the life
- Our behavioral pattern is our Attitude
- Your persistent behavior is your Attitude
- Attitudes are never permanent
- Our habits are our Attitudes
- Attitudes are moody
Formation of attitudes
Picture this! A male and female are quarrelling on the busy road. There are several people passing by, and you are one of them. Nobody knows the reason for quarrelling. Now, what you do. You just ignore and left, or will you try to stop them fighting. Whatever you do, is your attitude for that time only. Attitude of people changes quickly according to their perception and needs. Attitudes form according to social roles and norms.
Attitudes change in accordance with perception
We could be in jubilant mood for some reason; suddenly, at times, we may come across some situation or a person that puts us in depressive mood. This is simply because of our perception of that situation or person.
Becoming good attitudinal person is easy
If you have will and desire to become a good attitudinal person, you can learn by observing the people and situations around you. You may start learning things and knowing about great personalities, and emulate their style to have a good attitude.
Importance of Attitude – Attitude Vs Skill
For example, Sachin Tendulkar is the best batsman in the world. But that does not give him the laurels, unless he shows good attitude towards the players and umpires. True to that, Sachin Tendulkar has been maintaining good attitude since 1989. that’s why he has impeccable personality and that fetched him several awards.
If a player is performing well on the field and his attitude is not up to the acceptable level, then people around him get irritated and soon he will be thrown out of the team and never be considered for selection. His attitude caused a great loss to his career.
If a player is not performing well on field and trying hard towards success with good attitude, he will definitely be considered for selection by offering extra chances. His attitude entails to cement his place in the team.
Attitude is everything – Why?
You want to live happily and get success in your life. Simply wanting and aspiring do not fetch you desired results. If you monitor your attitude and make yourself good attitudinal person, it will make tremendous impact on your work performance and relationships with everyone around you. Everyone will respect your attitude and emulate your style, which makes you a good and true leader.
Here are some tips to improve your attitude:-
Always think positively Through self-motivation Watch your words
Greet people with positivity that sends good vibes Show enthusiasm
Be humorous
Positive and Negative mental attitudes
“A positive mental attitude is the starting point of riches, whether they be riches of material nature or intangible riches”
– Napoleon Hill The meaning of attitude will never be perfect without addressing positive and negative aspects. Since we know that attitude is impending action, according to our behavior and perception, the results will be in accordance with our belief. There is no hard and fast rule how to become a positive thinker. It is simple and plain thinking with Assertiveness and Emotional Intelligence. Do not waste your time on negative things, though sometimes inevitable. Always try to spend the time with positive people and friends, who can encourage you all the way through to your goal. Share your goals only with people, who will support you, not those who will respond with cynicism or indifference. People, who convert negative energy into positive energy, are always successful.
Attitudes – Positive Vs Negative
Positive Mental Attitude : People who have positive mental attitude believe in positivity, and they expect positive results, and they get it. Positive attitude is like feel good factor and when we feel good, everything around us looks good and our subconscious mind sends positive signals keeping us in healthy environment. Positive attitude people always have good relationships, health, happiness and success.
Every human being has the power to change his or her attitude at any point of time. People who have positive mental attitude, in whatever they do, will make things much easier and more enjoyable, Positive thinking doesn’t ignore the problem and change the reality. It helps us to see the problem in a different perspective and our positive mental attitude directs us to solve the problem in a realistic manner with ‘Can do’ mental ability. It gives us the capacity to control our own thoughts and feelings.
Negative Mental Attitude : People who have negative mental attitude believe in negativity, and they expect negative results, and they realize it, If you think negatively, your mind will automatically draws towards, negative feeling and everything looks terrible. When you expect negative results, your mind never tilts to take risks and try new areas. Negative mental attitude is infectious and spreads to whole environment that you deal with, thereby producing negative results.
In order to have positive mental attitude, concentrate on following points:-
- Believe in yourself
- Treat the life as a gift
- Keep yourself away from negative attractions
- Remain positive throughout your life
- Face the difficult challenges with positive mind set
- Preach and practice positive things
- Make friendship with other positive attitude people
- Use your positive attitude in all your endeavors
- Learn to master positive mental attitude for success
- Always use positive language
- Keep Learning and be grateful for your life
Freedom is not free, still people are spending spree To get freedom free, we always need decree
To make society living free, teach morals to your pedigree Even advice is not free! so, never involve in jamboree
Discipline
“Discipline is the bridge between goal and accomplishment”
What is discipline?
A routine and automatic behavior of performing duties and doing actions, in accordance with laid down principles, whether it is a law, legislation, rule or self-imposed restrictions.
Self-discipline
Self-discipline is self-imposed restriction to do particular thing or things in a systematic manner consciously and sometimes automatically, with “will power” and “persistence”.
Advantages with discipline and Self-discipline:-
- discipline is one of the traits of good personality
- Self-discipline can empower to give up vices
- Self-discipline entails time management
- Discipline leads to success
- If we read in a disciplined way, we can master the subject
- A disciplined life keeps us healthy and give happiness
- A disciplined man is a virtuous man
Thus, a good personality is having character, behavior, attitude and maintained in a disciplined manner.
For happy and peaceful living with good personality, embrace following precious and valuable points:-
Always treat people, as you want to be treated
Never be arrogant despire having huge success and money Greet people, at home and work place with whole heartedness Show empathy on others, while sticking to assertiveness
Always try to help people in a possible way
Never make remarks on people with snide and derision Maintain sound health with good food habits
Keep yourself away from political and religious conflicts
Always maintain cordial relations with people and never be aggressive Motivate people within you reach
Attire yourself according to your profession
Involve in any of social services in permissible times Fill your quiver with sharp arrows
For example, one of your important goals is to become a entrepreneur, and want to provide hundreds and thousands of jobs to your country men, like the founders of infosys and HCL Technologies, then you can read the books and stories published on these eminent people and have few pictures of these proven- success personalities at your work station and at home, because these are the people, who reached top position with their sheer determination and hard work and achieved their goals, far better than they thought and perceived.
By reading the books of these famous people, you would always be in driver’s seat in the journey of your goal. By looking at the pictures of these great people, you would always, now and then, rejuvenate yourself by keeping intact your impeccable personality, People, who do not have any goals, usually laugh at these acts. But, you never get worry about negative, taunting and de-motivation group. You can still bypass them with your ingenuity. Try to make positive and ideal group and discuss about your dream, which may help you at times, when you need their help to boost up your energy levels.
Remember! The procedure you followed only is considered than that of money and material things you have gained. That’s what the impeccable personality is.
What is my role, if I have no goal?
Looking all the time at pole, sitting on the bale I have one tale, but I can’t sale
Because, it can’t be measured with the scale Gale or regale, never fall into vale
It doesn’t make any difference, if you are a male or female so, set a good, for winning the whole
A Killer instinct – Automation of mind towards the goal
Having a goal in life is easier than accomplish it. A killer instinct towards achieving goal makes you put more focus on target. When you have the concentrated focus on your goal, and you believe in your thoughts that you are going to hit the target, your subconscious mind automatically works in accordance with your focus.
When we start implementing the very idea that we had generated, we’ll often find ourselves feeling more passionate as well. “Burning desire” is more than a passion or a will. It disturbs your sleep, and the desire in you remains on auto pilot, even when you are in sleeping mode. That’s what automation of mind is, and that keeps the focus on target permanently.
Having gained the knowledge on Assertiveness, Emotional Intelligence, Effective communication and Personality development, it is time for you to accelerate the process of goal achievement.
Extraordinary things by ordinary people
A great book, recently, I had read is “Wings of Fire” by APJ Abdul Kalam, a rocket scientist and former president of the great democratic India. As I read the book, I was absolutely amazed at how someone could be so rigorously enthusiastic about work. His initial desire was to become aeronautical engineer, but inadvertently he pursued the field whichever came to his way. That is where extraordinary people make different from ordinary people. And, everyday knows what he made in subsequent endeavors. Putting focus on things which are not relevant and change of focus suddenly on differnt field is very absurd, but
only few people who have the caliber to versatility can make the difference, and accomplish their tasks, not only for themselves for the country as well.
Students should not feel bad or lose the interest, when they don’t get the branch of their choice. Instead, they have to put more interest and focus in whatever they are studying, and reach the highest position of their field with sheer determination and hard work, while having burning desire with whole set of soft skills embedded in them.
Employees too, should feel proud in their jobs and strive to work hard for the benefit of themselves as well as the organization they are working for.
